I was six when I realised that my family was not perfect. Six years later, I realised that the normal, let alone perfect family does not exist. Each family has its own hardships concealed by all that wide smiles. They have issues that those glossy photographs hanging on the walls aren’t going to show. Anyway, what is normal? An average of all the madness? I don’t know. Normal seems to be just what every family is pretending to be amidst all the chaos. But a family that is not normal, nor perfect is far more beautiful than a (hypothetical) perfect one. Wabi-sabi! Despite all the mess, we stuck together as a family. Despite the differences, we supported each other. Despite the difficult times, we survived together. The strong pillars in every family are usually the parents. April 12 was my parents’ 26’th wedding anniversary. I think I speak for myself and anneh when I say that both of you have been great parents and we have a lot to thank y’all for.
A big thank you for producing us! I know Mummy that pregnancy must have been a painful and difficult process. But I think raising us up(especially me) must have been an even painful and difficult process. I am so grateful that both of y’all generally did not resort to beating as a means of disciplining. I know so many of my friends got physically abused in the name of disciplining. I have even heard one of my friend’s parents say that nothing works as well as some good old spanking. Even if I did get low marks in a spelling test or something, you made me do Thoppukaranam instead of beating me. Y’all often also explained why something was wrong and made us reflect on our actions. Mummy sometimes gave me the silent treatment to show that she is upset and to allow me to think about why she’s upset and later apologise to her for it. Even when Annae and I fought, we had a case hearing headed by the both of you(Mummy mostly) and all disputes were fairly settled without any beating. Thank you for also being great role models. I think I learnt how to be genuinely nice to people from y’all. Thank you for being patient while teaching me how to tie the shoelace and other things. I still don’t know how to tie it perfect but I don’t trip on my own shoelace so I guess I am doing great. Thank you for not pampering us too much. I received 50cents when I was in primary 1 and it has gradually increased over time. It was never more than what was neccessary and I always saved the residual amount to buy notebooks(I used to collect notebooks as a hobby). I think I learnt good personal financial management from my Mummy even before actually learning about these stuff in poly and uni. Thank you for bringing me up as a budget princess. I didn’t always get everything that I asked for. But y’all always got me whatever I needed. I have generally been a clumsy child. Mummy used to call me CC: Clumsy Creature. Haha! I think it’s a well-deserved accolade. I need to thank you for not scolding me when I broke your lipstick and smudged it all over my kindergarten uniform(What a vain child I was!). I was really scared that you were going to scold me but you didn’t. That made me feel even more guilty and I never broke any of your lipsticks after that. (Though, in retrospect, I suspect that you were actually glad that I broke your lipstick because you could get a new lipstick in a different shade. Haha!) Thank you for not scolding me when I choked the tap with tissue papers. I don’t know what I was thinking. There are so many other things to thank y’all for but I think I should stop here.
I am also sorry for many things. I know that I am not a sweet daughter. I do get angry at times and I do vent it towards y’all. The thing is you are the only people who would go through all of that and still love me the same. I am sorry that I neither satisfy nor try to satisfy all the expectations that you have of me. I am sorry that I don’t always listen to y’all. I am sorry that I don’t agree with most things that you say and I am always arguing with y’all. Maybe I should just agree to disagree hereon. Haha! I am sorry that your daughter sometimes dresses like a Pichakaari (female beggar). I am sorry that I don’t spend enough time with y’all. Sometimes, I just like being alone.
I want y’all to know that no matter what happens, I will still be your daughter. Regardless of what decisions I make regarding my career or my personal life, I am still your daughter. Your baby girl has grown up now.(Actually she has grown way too much, haha!) She is not the same person that she used to be. She wants to try new things. She wants to explore a bit. She is still trying to find herself. Wait, why am I writing in third person perspective now? Haha! I am changing but beneath all the layers, I am still the same little girl and I will love y’all the same. 🙂 I can’t wait to start working and send y’all both on holidays. Haha! 🙂